In 2011, Congregation Or Shalom built a new education building. The Berwyn synagogue had almost 200 members in its congregation and nearly 100 kids in its Hebrew school. Alan Daroff, a synagogue founder in 1974, called that moment the “peak” of Or Shalom’s congregational life.
Twelve years later, the Conservative synagogue is down to 75 members.
As Miriam Leshem, Or Shalom’s director of education, explained, “Our children waited to have children later and didn’t move back to the area. Back in the old days, people got married younger. Most of it is demographics.” And, as Daroff added, the children of Or Shalom members often choose Orthodox and Reform congregations over Conservative communities. Daroff’s own children belong to Chabad and Reform synagogues.
Attracting young people is one challenge. Keeping old members is another.
“A number of our members, who have been members for years, have either died or moved out of the area. Even me. I’m in Florida looking at the beach,” said Daroff, who only lives in Chester County for half the year.
But for Daroff, Leshem and others, there are still reasons to stay.
Daroff served as the rabbi in 1974 and ’75, before the synagogue hired one. He’s been the president. He’s headed the ritual committee. He’s in his second stint as treasurer right now. Even from Florida, Daroff participates in services via Zoom. And when he’s back in Pennsylvania, the longtime member attends the community’s once-a-month Shabbat dinners.
“I’ve been there for so long, it’s home,” he said.
Leshem stays because she’s committed to the religious school students and their parents. She has spent more than a decade helping to build the kids into future prayer leaders and synagogue members. She said she wants them to grow into proud Jews. The director of education also appreciates that Or Shalom members are serious Jews. Many can read Torah and run a minyan.
“It’s spiritually uplifting,” she said.
Other congregants agree. Close to 30 are planning on attending a community seder for Passover in April, according to Daroff. Those once-a-month Shabbat dinners draw between 20 and 30 people. In December, 50 members attended. And for Purim, 36 showed up.
Janet Emanuel, 76, has been a congregant for 40 years. When she first walked in, she made friends, and that’s why she still walks in today. Emanuel’s daughter and granddaughter also live nearby, and the grandmother has taken her granddaughter to services for years. When it came time for the young girl to enroll in religious school, Or Shalom was there.
“It’s the people,” Emanuel said.
Julie LaFair Miller, a congregant for 42 years, joined when she moved to Chester County with her husband. Their son and daughter attended religious school and had b’nai mitzvahs at Or Shalom. The parents made their “dearest friends” at the synagogue, said LaFair Miller. Today, the couple lives in Center City but still travels 30 minutes to Berwyn for congregational life.
“We were there for Purim. I’ll be there next week,” LaFair Miller said.
Allon Bloch and his family are in a different situation. Bloch is 40. Two of his kids are in religious school. He admitted that it was “a little awkward” to be one of the only young families in the congregation. But the Malvern resident said that, “As long as we’re in the area, I would expect to be part of that community.”
“As long as we’re in the area.” It’s a nice sentiment. But it also seems like too few people are in the area these days. Emanuel mentioned that several of her synagogue friends no longer live in Chester County. They reside in Nevada and Florida, with no lingering family connection to Berwyn. Leshem said that the children “move away after college.”
Or Shalom is making some of the same attempts that other Philadelphia area synagogues make to attract young people. The once-a-month Shabbat dinners. The Men’s Club’s recent bowling night. The Sunday morning yoga classes at the synagogue. The game nights, music programs, plays, arts and crafts classes and cooking classes.
But there is no easy answer for demographic change.
“The numbers are either there or they’re not there,” Leshem said. “We’re doing what we can.” ■
