By Ellen Braunstein
Noah Strauss, an oral history videographer, has delved into the end-of-life journey of a dying rabbinical student and the intimate network of friends surrounding him at that time.
Strauss’s subject, Emet Tauber, was a disabled and chronically ill student attending the Reconstructionist Rabbinical College in Wyncote.
He died on March 25, 2019, at the age of 24 from complications of Ehlers-Danlos, a genetic disorder that affects the body’s connective tissue, including collagen.
Around him formed a group of rabbinical students, some of whom were also disabled and chronically ill, Strauss said.
Strauss documented Tauber’s time in hospice.
“Emet wanted to have his story documented even in dying. He knew how connected he was to others and he wanted to help others learn through his journey,” said Strauss, who lives in West Philadelphia.
Strauss’s ongoing oral history project was presented at a launch event sponsored by Tribe 12 in May. The Philadelphia organization provides resources and support to young Jewish entrepreneurs.
“I feel like I have the support of the Philadelphia community behind the project now, the wind at my back,” Strauss said.
The first organization to take part in Strauss’ project was Disability Belongs, a nonprofit that works to create systemic change in how society views and values people with disabilities.
In Strauss’ words, the oral histories documented people “who were part of a radical experiment in community care and mutual aid that was Emet’s hospice room.”
The experiment started out of necessity. When Tauber entered Penn Hospice in December 2018, he was told he couldn’t bring his service dog without constant supervision. So, efforts were made to have someone with Tauber at all times. The visitation list expanded.
“I’ve interviewed everyone who was involved about why and how the effort worked,” Strauss said, “what it was about the people’s skill sets that made it possible.”
People compared Tauber’s hospice room “to a living shiva house because we would come in and sit down and tell stories,” Strauss said. “We grieved together before Emet passed.”
Tauber wanted a living funeral “to hear the nice things people said about him,” Strauss said. Strauss’s video project recreates the atmosphere of the living funeral and shiva. A photo gallery with 25 recorded interviews is available on a website. Strauss plans to conduct 20 more interviews.
“I see this really as my life’s work. I strive to serve and that is my vision in whatever form that takes,” Strauss said.
Strauss, 31, belongs to Congregation Rodeph Shalom, a Reform temple in Center City. For the past seven years, Strauss has taught at Jewish Children’s Folkshul, a secular humanistic Jewish community in Chestnut Hill.
Strauss grew up in West Chester, Pennsylvania, and attended Kesher Israel Congregation as a child.
Strauss also attended Penn State University and then transferred to Gratz College to earn a master’s degree in Judaism and human rights.
The videographer met Tauber in 2016 at an event they staffed for Jewish teenagers.
“We immediately became best friends,” Strauss said.
“Tauber was vulnerable and real. He spoke to the parts of people that felt most alone. He had a real skill as a community organizer in bringing people together. He made sure every person in the room felt included, even those on Zoom and Facebook live streams.”
A sign on his door in hospice read: “New friends are always welcome.”
“He wanted people to know that he was still open to making new friends,” Strauss said.
Strauss has connected with Reconstructionist Judaism because of Tauber’s influence and that of the other college students who visited him.
“I was seeing the best of the Reconstructionist movement with a Philadelphia flavor in Emet’s room. The rabbinical students were taking what they were learning in the classroom and practicing it. They were experimenting and adapting to the philosophy of Reconstructionism,” Strauss said. “This dedication to being each other’s keeper.”
The ways the rabbinical students reached out to Emet changed Strauss’s view of religion.
“I’ve had my struggles being secular in the Jewish community, but I always come back to it.”
Last year, Strauss completed a fellowship with the Shomer Collective, a Jewish organization leading conversations about death and dying. The instructors demonstrated using a medieval painting of a group of rabbis surrounding a dying rabbi.
“It could have been a picture of my friends surrounding Emet,” Strauss said. “There’s a connectedness, I think, of the threads across Jewish time.”
As a fellow of the Shomer Collective, Strauss developed a school lesson plan about Tauber. Strauss also teaches fourth graders at Folkshul about the death of Moses.
“Every year when I teach the death of Moses, I talk about how Jewish leaders don’t always live to see their legacy play out, but the students are part of his legacy now. When Tauber was in hospice, the students painted a banner with the lessons he had taught us,” Strauss said.
Six years after Tauber’s death, Strauss is still affected by working on the oral history project.
“One of the things that lasts is my experience of being around my best friend. He gave me permission to heal openly.”
Strauss said that the friendship doesn’t end. “You are still in conversation with your friends. They are walking with you all the way.”
Ellen Braunstein is a freelance writer.