By Ellen Braunstein
As a professional matchmaker, Kami Verne carefully evaluates the fixed and flexible aspects of her clients’ needs.
“Do they have strict requirements on location, religious beliefs, politics or not wanting children? I talk about where they could be flexible and what non-negotiable values they are looking for in another person,” she said.
The Philadelphia matchmaker and dating coach has an entirely Jewish clientele. They are all over the world due to her relationship with her employer, the observant matchmaker Aleeza Ben Shalom. She rose to fame when she was prominently featured on the Netflix series “Jewish Matchmaking.”
“Aleeza’s fame has expanded her reach globally, and we stay in constant touch,” said Verne, a 50-year-old resident of Conshohocken. “This connection allows me to assist clients from around the world. Aleeza’s passion for her work ensures I maintain high standards for our clients.”
Verne encourages clients to stick to the values they want to share with another person.
“We really want the end goal to be shalom bayit, Hebrew for domestic harmony. Whatever wisdom they gain from the search process, which, God willing, leads to a marriage, they carry with them forever,” she said.
When conflicts arise, Verne hopes her advice will resonate, helping clients remember their values and the love they have for their partner, thus fostering a harmonious marriage.
With the rise of online dating fatigue, Verne’s profession has gained popularity.
“I think apps are a tool, one of many tools that I help people work with. I wouldn’t tell somebody to go completely off the app,” she said.
Verne teaches her clients to be self-reliant.
“They have successfully found relationships as I guide them to become their own matchmaker,” she added.
A former criminal defense attorney, Verne became involved in matchmaking through Linda Sommer, an executive coach from New Hope. Verne uses Sommer’s Road2You surveys to help singles and couples uncover and understand their unconscious motivations.
“We’ve helped hundreds of clients communicate better, both as singles and as couples,” Verne said.
Verne stays active in the Jewish and non-Jewish worlds, as both a philanthropist and community advocate. She is also a single mother whose daughters, Alexa and Brooke, are now in college.
Verne belongs to Har Zion, a Conservative synagogue in Penn Valley and serves on the board of the Jack M. Barrack Hebrew Academy in Bryn Mawr. She also has been on the board of Friends of Ofanim. Ofanim in Israel provides educational opportunities for children living on Israel’s periphery.
She was recognized as honorary chair of the 2019 Philadelphia gala in support of Emily’s Entourage, a nonprofit that helps search for a cure for rare mutations of cystic fibrosis.
Verne is also involved with Philly Friendship Circle, which connects teens and young adults to youth with special needs and their families. The program offers a full range of social activities.
She is even the lead volunteer for the Friendship Circle Walk on Nov. 10.
“You will see me cheering on all those walkers. It is one of my happiest moments of the year,” she said.
Verne had little connection to Judaism growing up in Penn Valley.
“I was a bat mitzvah for the party. I didn’t know Moses from Abraham,” she said.
Twelve years ago, she heard the Orthodox Jewish educator Nili Cousins speak.
“She was talking about God in a way I had never heard anybody speak about God. I was so moved,” Verne said.
The two women reached out to one another and Verne started taking Jewish classes with Cousins and Ruthi Lynn, another Orthodox teacher.
“I was so inspired,” she said.
Verne began hosting women’s classes in her house. Hundreds of women have participated over the years. Verne has also become more observant.
“My parents, who knew absolutely nothing about their Judaism, will tell you that their favorite thing in the world is coming to my Shabbat dinners. So, it’s really been a blessing,” she said.