By Rabbi Erica Steelman

This week’s Torah portion is Yitro: Exodus 18:1 – 20:23

In the mid-1990s, while waiting for a subway car in a dingy, underground station, I heard music. My train arrived; I didn’t budge. Train after train came and went. The music captivated me. Eventually, I turned and walked toward the source – a man seated on a bench playing his violin, next to him a tower of stacked, empty, coffee-stained paper cups.

When he took a break, I approached and faced him. To my surprise, I learned that he had been first violinist in his home country’s orchestra. I don’t recall which nationality he said he was; Serbian? Bosnian? I just remember sensing layers of pain and devastation and my own ignorance of the complicated fighting that had been raging in that region. This imprinted encounter has remained with me for decades.

Torah tells us that with Moses alone, did God speak panim al panim, face-to-face. While Torah may describe God in anthropomorphic terms, tradition teaches us to interpret such descriptive words figuratively. We can intuit, therefore, that the encounters between Moses and God are uniquely direct and intimate. Is Moses’ direct and intimate relationship with God the reason for Moses’ greatness? I would argue no. Moses’ greatness stems from his sensitivity and openness to the world around him, which includes but is not limited to God.

Moses faces what and who he encounters with an openness that is humility manifested.
In Hebrew, the word for “face,” panim, is plural. How interesting that, while in English we speak of a person’s face, in Hebrew the word, when translated, literally means “faces.” This week’s parsha begins by describing a man by more than one identity marker. In the first verse, Ex 18:1, this person is referred to as Yitro, priest of Midian, Moses’ father-in-law. We may question how they all can be true, but Torah leaves no ambiguity: Yitro is not an Israelite; he is a Midianite priest, and he is Moses’ father-in-law. Within one face, and this is true for all of us, there are many others. Some may be revealed to us, while others remain hidden. When we encounter someone, there is always more to that person than what we first see, hear, experience.

The word panim is also related to the verb “to turn.” To experience others and the world around us in a direct and intimate way requires turning and facing the other. We must be willing to pivot, to notice and then to direct our attention outward. Moses does this repeatedly in the Torah. In this week’s parsha, we see the beauty and power of two people turning toward the other with mutual love, care and concern.

Moses and Yitro, to me, represent the best of showing up, being present and facing the other, not to see a reflection of oneself, but to be open to that which is unfamiliar, to another’s insight, perspective, experiences. They are not threatened or repelled by their differences. They make space both within themselves and externally for others.

After hearing about what God did for Moses and the people of Israel, Yitro leaves his home to find Moses in the wilderness, and brings with him his daughter, Tzipporah, Moses’ wife, and their two sons, Gershom and Eliezer. In Ex 18:7, we read that Moses goes out to greet his father-in-law as he is arriving. Moses, who now is the leader of the people of Israel and God’s servant, who could have remained seated in his tent and had his guests brought to him, sets out to meet them as they arrive. Verse 18:7 continues, “He bowed low and kissed him; each asked after the other’s welfare…” They have been separated by time and geographic distance, but their bond remains.

The next day, Yitro observes Moses in action and sees that, from morning until night, he is sitting and listening to the issues of the people of Israel. Yitro speaks to Moses and advises him; Moses listens and implements the judicial system Yitro describes. They show us differences in backgrounds and perspectives, and spending time with others face-to-face can result in positive changes. We can help one another. We are stronger when we find ways to learn from one another, care for one another and work together.

In her song, “From a Distance,” songwriter Julie Gold sings, “From a distance, we are instruments, marching in a common band.” Up close, we might not perceive our interconnectedness, and we might not appreciate that we are in the same boat, on the same team, in the same marching band. But Yitro and Moses remind us that it is possible to create beautiful, meaningful music together while each marching to the beat of his own drum. It starts with us.

Rabbi Erica Steelman is a chaplain, consultant and educator.